Home of the Blue Mango

One stop for insanity.
"If life gives you lemons, squeeze the juice into a water gun and squirt people in the eyes with it."
- This deep thought brought to you from Nina's subconscious.

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Introspective onion peeling...

So my psych major roomate and I had a long conversation the other night about the marvels of introspection and how "healthy" it can be for people to do it on a regular basis....oh how I beg to differ. First of all, if people are truly like onions as my roomate suggests, with a multitude of layers each thicker than the last, then each subsequent "peeling" session will eventually lead to what I like to call the "onion core" or cough..."nucleus" for all the nerds in the house (holla!..whew). And what is in the onion nucleus pray tell? Well, not to get dramatic, but to put it simply the nucleus contains everything that is (and should be) cloaked in secrecy. The nucleus is a veritable treasure trove (or Pandora's box, depending on how you look at it) of personal idiosyncracies, repressed feelings/desires, and peculiarities that unless you constantly take time out to analyze, are mostly unaware of. There's a REASON for this, people! If your mind really wanted you to be conscious of all your bizarre, illogical perceived wants, it wouldn't take the trouble of constructing the onion nucleus in the first place. Hell, it would all be out in the open, and every single fleeting thought would immediately be verbally expressed, without ever hovering in purgatory waiting for your brain to give a reluctant green-light.
But the fact that there is always some degree of censure involved in everyday conversation, implies that people are always set on a very basic, primal self-preservation mode. By basic self-preservation, I mean on an emotional level, lest it be confused with the chest-beating caveman "must kill wooly mammoth or starve" variety. To safeguard people from what they think they want, or what they secretly know they want, the mind employs these amazingly complex mechanisms to deflect, distance, and preserve the onion core from the scrutiny of other people. Moreover, the mind may go further and try to conceal said mechanisms from the owner, if they feel the owner isn't ready to handle the truth (cue X files music).... yeah, a real mind trip I know!
I was aware of these mechanisms on some level I suppose but the more I learn about it, compliments of free psychiatric analysis provided by my roomate, I'm more convinced that there is a precarious balance between the mind's control of the onion core and the rampant unconscious, which is basically dying to undo all the carefully erected defense mechanisms and engage in a humiliating "show and tell" of sorts. More often than not, the mind lays down the law and bitch-slaps the unconscious back into its dark corner, and all you people should be damn grateful for that...really. Of course, sometimes the unconscious gains the upperhand and diabolically plays each defense mechanism against the other until before you know it, you realize your one layer away from being uh...metaphorically naked.
There are differing opinions on the implications such a state would have on a person.. On the one hand, constant or long time repression can result in your unconscious being fed up by your apparent lack of backbone and your mind is sick of you denying things....and hence, it tires of getting you to see the truth (whatever it may be) gradually. It'll straight away resort to mentally bludgeoning you with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer. And no one likes to be bludgeoned, so maybe shedding an occasional layer once in awhile isn't a bad way to go. Again, I'm no authority on this and all the "theories" above could be mere supposition but it's interesting nevertheless...